Interview Summary
The 18-year-old participant chose a poem called Ode to a Nightingale by John Keats. They mention that the poem was meaningful for them because of how lost and depressed they were feeling. The first time they read it was because of an assignment they had for a course, and the second time was because they shared it with a friend. When reading it, they felt touched by it and felt many emotions. Because of the high quality of the work and the beautiful language in which it was written, the participant reconnected with their love for writing poetry, made the decision of changing their major, and believed the author wrote it for himself and not for others. However, it was difficult for them to read it because of the depressive episode they were going through.
From the poem they interpreted ultimate meaning as the connection between the fear of death and the confusion that comes with it. While reading the poem, they felt like if they were outside of their body and if like they couldn’t get past the dark thoughts they were experiencing. However, the poem helped them leave that difficult place they were in, and it helped them be able to talk about the topic.
Interview Transcript
Introduction
Interviewer: Okay, so, do you see that it’s recording?
Participant 5: Yes.
Interviewer: Great, so hello, I’m Laura, I’m from Case Western Reserve University. As you may recall you agreed to participate in the art’s experience study and filled out the survey. So, thank you very much for that. This is the second part of the study. So basically, we will conduct an interview with you through zoom of course, it’s not going to be more than half an hour, it’s usually between 15 minutes and half an hour. So, is this good for you?
Participant 5: Yes.
Interviewer: Okay great, so, before we start, I do, well, I wanted to remind you that you completed a consent form for the interview and so like, do you have any questions about that?
Participant 5: No
Interviewer: Okay cool, so okay cool, again you already know but we will record the meeting, so is that okay with you?
Participant 5: Yes.
Interviewer: Basically, this interview is because we are interested in asking you to tell us about some of the interactions you’ve had, with well, one particular interaction you’ve had with an artwork created by another artist. So, we are just going to ask you to describe the inter, like the, I was going to say interview, the artwork and like the experience in detail. And I’ll just explain everything better later. Do you have any questions by now?
Participant 5: No
Interviewer: Okay cool, I’m going to be asking you that a lot, I’m sorry
Participant 5: No, you’re good.
Interviewer: So, this is called the art interaction story. So basically again, we will be focusing on one interaction in particular that, like with an artwork someone else created, it may be a famous artwork or just like if a friend of yours created one, that’s also fine. It can be created by anyone except from you that’s literally the only requirement, so yeah. The artwork could be from any of the following domains, so it’s a whole list. So, I’ll just read it, and let me know if we have any questions after.
Participant 5: Okay
Interviewer: So, it's painting, drawing, sculpture, stained glass, installation, music, songs, dance, performance or film, literature, theater, fashion, crafts, mixed media, furniture design, architecture, interior design, plastic arts, or another art that we have not mentioned. So that was a lot, that was a lot. The artwork does not necessarily have to be the most important to you, but it does have to have any sort of like, like relevancy, and like it has to be meaningful somehow. And it helps well like, like your memories have to be kind of like vivid with this.
Description
Interviewer: But if you don't remember everything that's totally fine, so please choose it, and briefly tell me what it is
Participant 5: So, my artwork is called Ode to a nightingale and it's a poem by John Keats.
Interviewer: Oh, okay, Oh, that's interesting. Okay, so I’m guessing you don't have it with you, but
Participant 5: I have it on my iPad.
Interviewer: Oh, okay, do you think you can maybe share it on the screen?
Participant 5: Maybe
Interviewer: I don't know if that's possible
Participant 5: I don’t know if it’s possible either. I can. Is it possible for me to like email you like the document of it, or like.
Interviewer: Yeah.
Participant 5: Can I do that?
Interviewer: Yeah
Participant 5: Okay, I'll write that down. I'll do that after we’re done, or whenever.
Interviewer: Okay, great. Okay, so, okay, I know it's a poem. But can you please describe it and tell me what the important details about it are.
Participant 5: Yeah, kind of like the gist of the poem is that it's John Keats is describing a dream that he had, and this nightingale is singing to him. Uh, and I wrote a paper on, and actually a while ago. And I said that he was writing, he was using poetry to write to death in a way, and he the dreaming, is as close as he could get. He was very depressed, uh, so dreaming was as close as he could get to death. Umm, and I just thought it was, it was a beautiful piece so that was kind of that's the summary, I guess for the poem.
Interviewer: That is actually interesting. I hope he he
Participant 5: He’s dead, he passed away a long time ago.
Interviewer: No, I know but I hope he got through that somehow.
Why did you choose this one? (Specialness)
Interviewer: Okay, so why did you choose this one?
Participant 5: It kind of meant a lot to me, I guess, like I read this. I first read this my freshman years, fall semester of my freshman year here at Case, and I was feeling very disoriented and lost and depressed. And, I had to read this to one of my classes, and it just it really hit home for me, and I felt like it just had a lot of meeting, and the amount of words, I guess, uh, so yeah.
Interviewer: I'm sorry to hear that, what year are you?
Participant 5: I, I'm a sophomore, too.
Interviewer: Oh, okay, yeah, cool.
Participant 5: Thanks.
Interviewer: Well, yeah, I am sorry to hear that. But at least it's like, you can relate to it somehow.
Participant 5: Yeah
Interviewer: I guess. Okay. So now, it's the part of like where you're gonna tell me about the experience with interacting with the artwork. So, to do this, I’m just gonna ask you a bunch of questions, and so like it's easier for you to like, like be more exact kinda.
Participant 5: Okay
Process of Interacting
What led up to the interaction? What motivated you to explore this piece?
Interviewer: So, what let up to the interaction and what motivated you to explore this piece?
Participant 5: What let up to this, so I was assigned this reading for my sages this class and that motivated me to read it. I guess I was required to.
Interviewer: Okay, fair enough. What sages was it?
Participant 5: It was called Death Morning and Immortality.
Interviewer: That makes sense.
Participant 5: Yeah
When and where did the experience happen? Who was involved beside you (if anyone)?
Interviewer: That makes sense, now. Okay, when and where did the experience happen? And who was involved beside you, if anyone was.
Participant 5: I read this alone first, and then I read it again with my friend Samantha. So, I would say it was, probably it was earlier in the year. Like fall ish, like nowish time, I don't know the exact, umm and yeah, when I first read it, I was alone, kind of just in my in my dorm.
Can you describe any high points, low points, or challenges, or turning points along the way?
Interviewer: Okay, can you describe any high points, low points or challenges, or just like turning points along the way while you were like interacting with the poem?
Participant 5: Yeah, I think I, when I first started reading it, I was kind of thinking of it as like an assignment like another thing I had to do. But the further I got into the poem; I became really immersed in it. And towards the, the middle of the poem I was like, I wasn't crying. But I was like, really, I felt really emotional about it. And I kind of had to sit with myself afterwards for a pretty long time, and just try and process it all before I like. Read it again, and kind of went back through it.
Interviewer: Well, I'm glad you got to reflect with it that, that's pretty good actually. Okay. So now we're gonna talk about the impact that artwork had in your life.
What did you learn from the process of interacting with the artwork? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Interviewer: So, what did you learn from the process of the interaction, and that you learn anything about yourself?
Participant 5: I think I learned that I like reading poetry and I've always have. But I think, part of reading it was that it was describing something so like hard to talk about, and not really like, socially acceptable to talk about. But it was using such beautiful language umm, and so I kind of took that away, and with, like, you know, some things I think we, we do have to talk about. But I think there's also like beautiful ways to communicate that. So, yeah
Interviewer: That's really cool. So, you like poetry apparently
Participant 5: I do
Interviewer: Since when have you like liked writing poetry?
Participant 5: Uh, I've written poetry since I was really young, uh probably about 10, but I last stopped for a very long time, probably a couple of years, and then, I started back in college after I read that. So, it was kind of like a
Interviewer: Great
Participant 5: Yeah, remembering my passion, so yeah.
Interviewer: That, that's really nice, that's really nice.
Do you think the artist intended the artwork to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Interviewer: Do you think the artist wanted to, like intended the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Participant 5: It's hard to say, I don't, I think he wrote because he wanted to. He had a very unfortunate life, and died very young, like 25, and he died as not. His work was not recognized on any sort of level that it is now. In fact, people hated his work when he was alive, so I think the fact that he kept writing was show that it wasn't for other people, and it was for himself, which I think is more powerful in a way.
Interviewer: Do you know why he died?
Participant 5: I believe it was to tuberculosis.
Interviewer: Oh
Participant 5: But he also had some other. I think he had syphilis as well, so he was not having a good time.
Interviewer: That is not a good combination.
Participant 5: Yeah
Interviewer: That is not good, oh my god. Okay, so keeping with this, did your experience with the like did your experience with the artwork affect your understanding of others or the world in any way?
Participant 5: I would say kind of in the way that I sort of ended up changing my major into a psychology major.
Interviewer: Yes
Participant 5: Just because I, it was really interesting how he again captured, like such intense emotion in like words on a page, and really think about what he was going through and like. His end of life, which, which is really unfortunate, but like also just how people are every day, and how they live their lives. And well, I just thought it was, interesting.
Interviewer: Well, I'm glad you chose to be a psych major. We love psych majors, they are great, I love psych, I really do.
Participant 5: I do too
Interviewer: Amazing, see?
When some people think about themselves, they see some parts of themselves as deeply, true, real or authentic.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process? Did you have any insights about your own authentic (or inauthentic) self?
Interviewer: Umm, okay, so sometimes, when people think about themselves, they see some parts of themselves is equally true, real or authentic. If this idea resonates with you that you learn anything about your true nature, if we call it that during the process of interacting with the artwork and, then you find any, like did you have any insights about your own authentic or inauthentic self?
Participant 5: Yeah, I think it's when I was reading it, it took a lot for me to be like. Oh, like I'm going through a depressive episode, like I'm not really doing okay, but like I can get myself out of this. So, I think in that way it was like, it definitely helped me get out of a hard place. And also found like a way for, like a way to do that was through writing. And also, I just I just feel like I was more able to talk about those things. And if I couldn't talk about about it directly I could definitely like, write it down, and then try and explain it from there. So.
Interviewer: That's very nice, I also like writing, so I think it's pretty cool. I did get what you mean.
Participant 5: Yeah
Some people believe in ultimate meaning. This is defined as deep, underlying meaning that transcends subjective, personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significance of suffering, as well as spirituality.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: Okay, so some of the people believe in ultimate meeting. This is defined as deep underlying meaning that transcends subjective personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significant, significance of suffering as well as spirituality. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of interacting with the artwork?
Participant 5: Hmm, that's a hard one, I feel like hmm, ultimate meaning. That's a big one. I feel like I think it's just interesting, because some people are so scared of death and other people are the exact opposite. And so, I feel like the ultimate meaning is that this fear and longing and conf confusion is all kind of connected in some sort of way. So yeah.
Interviewer: Well, that's, that's deep, that’s deep, okay, I guess we were looking for a lot of we ask that question.
Some people believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs/experiences (such as perceived interactions with God) but also may include mystical or transcendent experiences, or interaction with spirits.
Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the interaction with the artwork?
Interviewer: To be honest. But okay, so some people believe or perceive a reality being on the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs, experiences such as perceived interactions with God, but also may include mystical or transcendence experiences or interactions with spirits. Did you have any kind of these experiences during the interaction with the artwork?
Participant 5: I wouldn't say religious. I would maybe say spiritual, right in a sense that I just felt very, very out of my body. But that was like, okay, like I didn't feel like, I don't know I didn’t feel like I was like in a different dimension or anything. I, I just felt like I was just, just kind of existing, and like that was okay for me to do right then. But I also feel like that was, hmm, I don't know, I don't know what else I thought.
Interviewer: I okay, I do, I do wanna like, tackle that a little bit
Participant 5: Okay, yeah
Interviewer: What was that like feeling, with like, like the experience like when you were like out of your body kinda.
Participant 5: I feel like it could be described as like kind of like dissociating a little bit. I can't, I just didn't feel like, I had like I knew that what I was experiencing was like depression, and umm, that was really hard, but I also didn't feel like that was not something I could get through like I felt like it was a very something that would pass and something that like me as a person, like a small person on this planet can like get through even though, umm, it's gonna be hard. I just felt like you know there's not gonna be, there's not some it's like depression isn't bigger than me. I guess.
Interviewer: Okay, that makes sense that, makes sense that's really a nice actually. That’s pretty cool. Okay, I already said that, oh, my God. Okay, I, now we have a similar like big exact questions. Hey, we're almost done actually, so.
How old were you?
Interviewer: How old were you when you read it?
Participant 5: oh gosh, I was 18.
Interviewer: Okay, okay, cool.
How did you perceive the quality of the works?
Interviewer: How did you perceive the quality of the work?
Participant 5: It's gorgeous, I love it.
What goals (if any) did you have for interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: That's nice. Umm, what goals if any, did you have for and like for interacting with the artwork like while you were interacting with it, did you have any sort of like goals or anything?
Participant 5: At the beginning, I didn't, I just wanted to finish the reading, but then I felt like I need to dissect it alone. Once I started becoming immersed in the work.
What is it about this artwork that distinguishes it from others, or what makes it special?
Interviewer: What is it about this artwork in particular, like this poem in particular, that this thing is just it from others? And what makes it special?
Participant 5: Oh, gosh, the word choice is beautiful and very unique to this writer like, I just, hmm let me look at it for a second it it's like, yeah, I've just I've never seen a poet really right about depression in this way, and he uses a lot of kind of old references that you don't really know, you have to look up, but it all makes a lot of sense once you do like, my notes are like I'll show you I guess, all my notes on the, oh the glare
Interviewer: Oh, my God. I did see like the, okay yeah,
Participant 5: There, yeah
Interviewer: Oh my god
Participant 5: It’s like, a lot.
Interviewer: That’s a lot
Participant 5: So yeah, I don't even know what I wrote. Yeah, this even the first line, like my heart, aches and a drowsy numbness pains. My sense is just, it's a gorgeous line, umm, there's a lot of good like sounds and syllables, and it flows really well, so I don't really know how else to explain it's just really good.
Interviewer: I gotta read it.
Participant 5: You do, it’s good.
Interviewer: I gotta read that. Okay. Was there any? No, I already know that, and I already know that too, but I will ask this one to like, like develop it a little bit more.
What was going on in your life around the time that you interacted with the artwork?
Interviewer: I guess? So, what was going in your life around the time that you interacted with the artwork?
Participant 5: I think it was, I was away from home, so I was feeling very homesick. But I at the time, I also kind of got out of like, a toxic situation. And so, I was just kind of reeling and processing through all of that. So I was, I felt very, umm, just yeah, disoriented and lost in my sense of like identity and self. And umm, like if I was doing okay like if I should be feeling like this all the time, and I wasn't kind of just like in the mindset of like push through it, push through it, but yeah, so I think that was definitely my mindset uh, at the time.
Interviewer: Fair enough, actually.
Participant 5: Yeah
Interviewer: Well, those are all the questions
Participant 5: Alright
The 18-year-old participant chose a poem called Ode to a Nightingale by John Keats. They mention that the poem was meaningful for them because of how lost and depressed they were feeling. The first time they read it was because of an assignment they had for a course, and the second time was because they shared it with a friend. When reading it, they felt touched by it and felt many emotions. Because of the high quality of the work and the beautiful language in which it was written, the participant reconnected with their love for writing poetry, made the decision of changing their major, and believed the author wrote it for himself and not for others. However, it was difficult for them to read it because of the depressive episode they were going through.
From the poem they interpreted ultimate meaning as the connection between the fear of death and the confusion that comes with it. While reading the poem, they felt like if they were outside of their body and if like they couldn’t get past the dark thoughts they were experiencing. However, the poem helped them leave that difficult place they were in, and it helped them be able to talk about the topic.
Interview Transcript
Introduction
Interviewer: Okay, so, do you see that it’s recording?
Participant 5: Yes.
Interviewer: Great, so hello, I’m Laura, I’m from Case Western Reserve University. As you may recall you agreed to participate in the art’s experience study and filled out the survey. So, thank you very much for that. This is the second part of the study. So basically, we will conduct an interview with you through zoom of course, it’s not going to be more than half an hour, it’s usually between 15 minutes and half an hour. So, is this good for you?
Participant 5: Yes.
Interviewer: Okay great, so, before we start, I do, well, I wanted to remind you that you completed a consent form for the interview and so like, do you have any questions about that?
Participant 5: No
Interviewer: Okay cool, so okay cool, again you already know but we will record the meeting, so is that okay with you?
Participant 5: Yes.
Interviewer: Basically, this interview is because we are interested in asking you to tell us about some of the interactions you’ve had, with well, one particular interaction you’ve had with an artwork created by another artist. So, we are just going to ask you to describe the inter, like the, I was going to say interview, the artwork and like the experience in detail. And I’ll just explain everything better later. Do you have any questions by now?
Participant 5: No
Interviewer: Okay cool, I’m going to be asking you that a lot, I’m sorry
Participant 5: No, you’re good.
Interviewer: So, this is called the art interaction story. So basically again, we will be focusing on one interaction in particular that, like with an artwork someone else created, it may be a famous artwork or just like if a friend of yours created one, that’s also fine. It can be created by anyone except from you that’s literally the only requirement, so yeah. The artwork could be from any of the following domains, so it’s a whole list. So, I’ll just read it, and let me know if we have any questions after.
Participant 5: Okay
Interviewer: So, it's painting, drawing, sculpture, stained glass, installation, music, songs, dance, performance or film, literature, theater, fashion, crafts, mixed media, furniture design, architecture, interior design, plastic arts, or another art that we have not mentioned. So that was a lot, that was a lot. The artwork does not necessarily have to be the most important to you, but it does have to have any sort of like, like relevancy, and like it has to be meaningful somehow. And it helps well like, like your memories have to be kind of like vivid with this.
Description
Interviewer: But if you don't remember everything that's totally fine, so please choose it, and briefly tell me what it is
Participant 5: So, my artwork is called Ode to a nightingale and it's a poem by John Keats.
Interviewer: Oh, okay, Oh, that's interesting. Okay, so I’m guessing you don't have it with you, but
Participant 5: I have it on my iPad.
Interviewer: Oh, okay, do you think you can maybe share it on the screen?
Participant 5: Maybe
Interviewer: I don't know if that's possible
Participant 5: I don’t know if it’s possible either. I can. Is it possible for me to like email you like the document of it, or like.
Interviewer: Yeah.
Participant 5: Can I do that?
Interviewer: Yeah
Participant 5: Okay, I'll write that down. I'll do that after we’re done, or whenever.
Interviewer: Okay, great. Okay, so, okay, I know it's a poem. But can you please describe it and tell me what the important details about it are.
Participant 5: Yeah, kind of like the gist of the poem is that it's John Keats is describing a dream that he had, and this nightingale is singing to him. Uh, and I wrote a paper on, and actually a while ago. And I said that he was writing, he was using poetry to write to death in a way, and he the dreaming, is as close as he could get. He was very depressed, uh, so dreaming was as close as he could get to death. Umm, and I just thought it was, it was a beautiful piece so that was kind of that's the summary, I guess for the poem.
Interviewer: That is actually interesting. I hope he he
Participant 5: He’s dead, he passed away a long time ago.
Interviewer: No, I know but I hope he got through that somehow.
Why did you choose this one? (Specialness)
Interviewer: Okay, so why did you choose this one?
Participant 5: It kind of meant a lot to me, I guess, like I read this. I first read this my freshman years, fall semester of my freshman year here at Case, and I was feeling very disoriented and lost and depressed. And, I had to read this to one of my classes, and it just it really hit home for me, and I felt like it just had a lot of meeting, and the amount of words, I guess, uh, so yeah.
Interviewer: I'm sorry to hear that, what year are you?
Participant 5: I, I'm a sophomore, too.
Interviewer: Oh, okay, yeah, cool.
Participant 5: Thanks.
Interviewer: Well, yeah, I am sorry to hear that. But at least it's like, you can relate to it somehow.
Participant 5: Yeah
Interviewer: I guess. Okay. So now, it's the part of like where you're gonna tell me about the experience with interacting with the artwork. So, to do this, I’m just gonna ask you a bunch of questions, and so like it's easier for you to like, like be more exact kinda.
Participant 5: Okay
Process of Interacting
What led up to the interaction? What motivated you to explore this piece?
Interviewer: So, what let up to the interaction and what motivated you to explore this piece?
Participant 5: What let up to this, so I was assigned this reading for my sages this class and that motivated me to read it. I guess I was required to.
Interviewer: Okay, fair enough. What sages was it?
Participant 5: It was called Death Morning and Immortality.
Interviewer: That makes sense.
Participant 5: Yeah
When and where did the experience happen? Who was involved beside you (if anyone)?
Interviewer: That makes sense, now. Okay, when and where did the experience happen? And who was involved beside you, if anyone was.
Participant 5: I read this alone first, and then I read it again with my friend Samantha. So, I would say it was, probably it was earlier in the year. Like fall ish, like nowish time, I don't know the exact, umm and yeah, when I first read it, I was alone, kind of just in my in my dorm.
Can you describe any high points, low points, or challenges, or turning points along the way?
Interviewer: Okay, can you describe any high points, low points or challenges, or just like turning points along the way while you were like interacting with the poem?
Participant 5: Yeah, I think I, when I first started reading it, I was kind of thinking of it as like an assignment like another thing I had to do. But the further I got into the poem; I became really immersed in it. And towards the, the middle of the poem I was like, I wasn't crying. But I was like, really, I felt really emotional about it. And I kind of had to sit with myself afterwards for a pretty long time, and just try and process it all before I like. Read it again, and kind of went back through it.
Interviewer: Well, I'm glad you got to reflect with it that, that's pretty good actually. Okay. So now we're gonna talk about the impact that artwork had in your life.
What did you learn from the process of interacting with the artwork? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Interviewer: So, what did you learn from the process of the interaction, and that you learn anything about yourself?
Participant 5: I think I learned that I like reading poetry and I've always have. But I think, part of reading it was that it was describing something so like hard to talk about, and not really like, socially acceptable to talk about. But it was using such beautiful language umm, and so I kind of took that away, and with, like, you know, some things I think we, we do have to talk about. But I think there's also like beautiful ways to communicate that. So, yeah
Interviewer: That's really cool. So, you like poetry apparently
Participant 5: I do
Interviewer: Since when have you like liked writing poetry?
Participant 5: Uh, I've written poetry since I was really young, uh probably about 10, but I last stopped for a very long time, probably a couple of years, and then, I started back in college after I read that. So, it was kind of like a
Interviewer: Great
Participant 5: Yeah, remembering my passion, so yeah.
Interviewer: That, that's really nice, that's really nice.
Do you think the artist intended the artwork to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Interviewer: Do you think the artist wanted to, like intended the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Participant 5: It's hard to say, I don't, I think he wrote because he wanted to. He had a very unfortunate life, and died very young, like 25, and he died as not. His work was not recognized on any sort of level that it is now. In fact, people hated his work when he was alive, so I think the fact that he kept writing was show that it wasn't for other people, and it was for himself, which I think is more powerful in a way.
Interviewer: Do you know why he died?
Participant 5: I believe it was to tuberculosis.
Interviewer: Oh
Participant 5: But he also had some other. I think he had syphilis as well, so he was not having a good time.
Interviewer: That is not a good combination.
Participant 5: Yeah
Interviewer: That is not good, oh my god. Okay, so keeping with this, did your experience with the like did your experience with the artwork affect your understanding of others or the world in any way?
Participant 5: I would say kind of in the way that I sort of ended up changing my major into a psychology major.
Interviewer: Yes
Participant 5: Just because I, it was really interesting how he again captured, like such intense emotion in like words on a page, and really think about what he was going through and like. His end of life, which, which is really unfortunate, but like also just how people are every day, and how they live their lives. And well, I just thought it was, interesting.
Interviewer: Well, I'm glad you chose to be a psych major. We love psych majors, they are great, I love psych, I really do.
Participant 5: I do too
Interviewer: Amazing, see?
When some people think about themselves, they see some parts of themselves as deeply, true, real or authentic.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process? Did you have any insights about your own authentic (or inauthentic) self?
Interviewer: Umm, okay, so sometimes, when people think about themselves, they see some parts of themselves is equally true, real or authentic. If this idea resonates with you that you learn anything about your true nature, if we call it that during the process of interacting with the artwork and, then you find any, like did you have any insights about your own authentic or inauthentic self?
Participant 5: Yeah, I think it's when I was reading it, it took a lot for me to be like. Oh, like I'm going through a depressive episode, like I'm not really doing okay, but like I can get myself out of this. So, I think in that way it was like, it definitely helped me get out of a hard place. And also found like a way for, like a way to do that was through writing. And also, I just I just feel like I was more able to talk about those things. And if I couldn't talk about about it directly I could definitely like, write it down, and then try and explain it from there. So.
Interviewer: That's very nice, I also like writing, so I think it's pretty cool. I did get what you mean.
Participant 5: Yeah
Some people believe in ultimate meaning. This is defined as deep, underlying meaning that transcends subjective, personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significance of suffering, as well as spirituality.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: Okay, so some of the people believe in ultimate meeting. This is defined as deep underlying meaning that transcends subjective personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significant, significance of suffering as well as spirituality. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of interacting with the artwork?
Participant 5: Hmm, that's a hard one, I feel like hmm, ultimate meaning. That's a big one. I feel like I think it's just interesting, because some people are so scared of death and other people are the exact opposite. And so, I feel like the ultimate meaning is that this fear and longing and conf confusion is all kind of connected in some sort of way. So yeah.
Interviewer: Well, that's, that's deep, that’s deep, okay, I guess we were looking for a lot of we ask that question.
Some people believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs/experiences (such as perceived interactions with God) but also may include mystical or transcendent experiences, or interaction with spirits.
Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the interaction with the artwork?
Interviewer: To be honest. But okay, so some people believe or perceive a reality being on the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs, experiences such as perceived interactions with God, but also may include mystical or transcendence experiences or interactions with spirits. Did you have any kind of these experiences during the interaction with the artwork?
Participant 5: I wouldn't say religious. I would maybe say spiritual, right in a sense that I just felt very, very out of my body. But that was like, okay, like I didn't feel like, I don't know I didn’t feel like I was like in a different dimension or anything. I, I just felt like I was just, just kind of existing, and like that was okay for me to do right then. But I also feel like that was, hmm, I don't know, I don't know what else I thought.
Interviewer: I okay, I do, I do wanna like, tackle that a little bit
Participant 5: Okay, yeah
Interviewer: What was that like feeling, with like, like the experience like when you were like out of your body kinda.
Participant 5: I feel like it could be described as like kind of like dissociating a little bit. I can't, I just didn't feel like, I had like I knew that what I was experiencing was like depression, and umm, that was really hard, but I also didn't feel like that was not something I could get through like I felt like it was a very something that would pass and something that like me as a person, like a small person on this planet can like get through even though, umm, it's gonna be hard. I just felt like you know there's not gonna be, there's not some it's like depression isn't bigger than me. I guess.
Interviewer: Okay, that makes sense that, makes sense that's really a nice actually. That’s pretty cool. Okay, I already said that, oh, my God. Okay, I, now we have a similar like big exact questions. Hey, we're almost done actually, so.
How old were you?
Interviewer: How old were you when you read it?
Participant 5: oh gosh, I was 18.
Interviewer: Okay, okay, cool.
How did you perceive the quality of the works?
Interviewer: How did you perceive the quality of the work?
Participant 5: It's gorgeous, I love it.
What goals (if any) did you have for interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: That's nice. Umm, what goals if any, did you have for and like for interacting with the artwork like while you were interacting with it, did you have any sort of like goals or anything?
Participant 5: At the beginning, I didn't, I just wanted to finish the reading, but then I felt like I need to dissect it alone. Once I started becoming immersed in the work.
What is it about this artwork that distinguishes it from others, or what makes it special?
Interviewer: What is it about this artwork in particular, like this poem in particular, that this thing is just it from others? And what makes it special?
Participant 5: Oh, gosh, the word choice is beautiful and very unique to this writer like, I just, hmm let me look at it for a second it it's like, yeah, I've just I've never seen a poet really right about depression in this way, and he uses a lot of kind of old references that you don't really know, you have to look up, but it all makes a lot of sense once you do like, my notes are like I'll show you I guess, all my notes on the, oh the glare
Interviewer: Oh, my God. I did see like the, okay yeah,
Participant 5: There, yeah
Interviewer: Oh my god
Participant 5: It’s like, a lot.
Interviewer: That’s a lot
Participant 5: So yeah, I don't even know what I wrote. Yeah, this even the first line, like my heart, aches and a drowsy numbness pains. My sense is just, it's a gorgeous line, umm, there's a lot of good like sounds and syllables, and it flows really well, so I don't really know how else to explain it's just really good.
Interviewer: I gotta read it.
Participant 5: You do, it’s good.
Interviewer: I gotta read that. Okay. Was there any? No, I already know that, and I already know that too, but I will ask this one to like, like develop it a little bit more.
What was going on in your life around the time that you interacted with the artwork?
Interviewer: I guess? So, what was going in your life around the time that you interacted with the artwork?
Participant 5: I think it was, I was away from home, so I was feeling very homesick. But I at the time, I also kind of got out of like, a toxic situation. And so, I was just kind of reeling and processing through all of that. So I was, I felt very, umm, just yeah, disoriented and lost in my sense of like identity and self. And umm, like if I was doing okay like if I should be feeling like this all the time, and I wasn't kind of just like in the mindset of like push through it, push through it, but yeah, so I think that was definitely my mindset uh, at the time.
Interviewer: Fair enough, actually.
Participant 5: Yeah
Interviewer: Well, those are all the questions
Participant 5: Alright
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