Self portrait:
Man in army jacket
Self portrait:
I nterview Summary
The participant chose to discuss a self-portrait that they painted.They chose to discuss this work because it was a surprisingly easy process that resulted in one of their best creations. Art has always been part of their life, but they created this work alone during a time where they had been studying art. Throughout the creation, they got lost in the process, but ultimately were satisfied with the result. There was steady incremental growth throughout the creation, which is unusual for the participant. This change in the creative process taught them that it’s okay to be spontaneous and have less control over the process, which also increased their confidence.
Others who saw the artwork received it well; one individual they aren’t very close with even hung it up in their home. They think they primarily created it for themselves, but believe they considered how others would react to it. They felt like they were “at the right place at the right time” when creating the painting and feel prideful of the piece. While they don’t believe in ultimate meaning and had no supernatural encounters, the creation of this painting made them feel like part of the universe as “one tiny thread of everything that is.”
Interview Transcript
Introduction
Interviewer: Okay. In this interview we are interested in asking you to tell us about an artwork that you created. We're going to ask you to describe this experience in detail. Do you have any questions?
[ Participant shakes head no ]
Description
Interviewer: Okay. We'd like you to think about an artwork that you created? That's especially meaningful to you. Your artwork could be from any of the following domains: painting, drawing, sculpture, stained glass, installation, music, songs, dance, performance art, film, literature, theater, fashion, mixed media, furniture, design, interior design, or any other our form we have not mentioned. The artwork does not necessarily have to be the most important to you, but it should be meaningful and mostly salient. It helps if your memories about creating the work or more vivid. So it's okay. If you don't, remember everything. It can be a work that you created at any age. Please choose your work and tell me what it is.
Participant: Would you prefer? I talked about the one that I learned about, or something that I have helpful, I could.
Interviewer: Whatever is easiest for you.
Participant: It's probably the one about this self portrait.
Interviewer: Okay. Can you? Just if you have it with you, can you show it?
Participant: Yeah. Just I don't have the actual piece, but I have an image of it hopefully. It will show up for you. You can see that
Interviewer: It's a beautiful piece.
Participant: Thanks.
Interviewer: So can you describe it for me and say any important details you'd like to note about it?
Participant: I believe it is 3 by 4 feet, so it's pretty big. It's acrylic paint. I think I wrote down what year I figured out, but I think it was probably around 2021 or 23, so I was probably in my early 30s. I did it in my mom's basement. I had been living with her briefly after getting some schooling that I was doing. I had a mirror set up, so it was done from life. I was dressed the way I've depicted in the Green Army jacket that I had in the image of myself was, you know, taken from what I was seeing, but it really looked like me. I'd say it's much more illustrated, more kind of expressive of me rather than anything.
Why did you choose this one? (Specialness)
Interviewer: Why did you choose this one to talk about?
Participant: I've always felt like it was one of my best paintings, and I'm not really sure how it happened. It's uhh it happened pretty quickly, and I would say very easily. I did very little editing. Usually I paint over endless, you know, several to dozens of times before I'm happy with it. And this just kind of came together within a single session that was made going to three hours long so like I really captured something that you know I hadn't intended to do, but not.
Process of Creation
What led up to the creation? What motivated you to create this piece?
Interviewer: Now please tell me about the experience and process of creating the work by answering the following series of questions. Sorry if any of this gets repetitive. If it's something you've already mentioned, you can just ask to move on to the next part. What led up to its creation, and what motivated you to create it?
Participant: Well, I was studying art at the time. I had taken some painting classes that kind of the county community college. And then shortly after that, I lived on my own, where I was in quite a bit, and then, after that I went to school for graphic design, and I can't really remember with where in that about 3 year period I did this, but art was always a part of my life.
When and where did the experience happen? Who was involved besides you (if anyone)?
Interviewer: So you already talked about when and where it happened. But was anybody else involved in the creation?
Participant: No, it was just myself
What were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process of interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: What were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process of creating the work? For example, at the beginning, middle, and end.
Participant: At the beginning I was probably thinking about the second thing I learned about drawing my life. I would say in the middle, which is people of most of my better paintings that I probably kinda got lost in it where I was really thinking about anything which is in the Us. And the the doing of it. I don't need track of time ending up to something. I like. It's also kind of a thinking by the end I was probably I would I don't know that I'd say elated, but close to great satisfaction.
Can you describe any high points, low points or challenges, or turning points along the way?
Interviewer: Can you describe any high points, low points, or turning points along the way?
Participant: I think it was just a pretty steady climb from blank canvas to a successful piece I know that it was.
It's just kind of a constant incremental growth, which again, if I chose, this is that a little unusual?
Let's talk a little bit about the impact of the artwork on you and your life.
What did you learn from the process of interacting with the artwork? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Interviewer: Now let's talk about the impact of the artwork on yourself and others. What did you learn from the process of creating the work? And did you learn anything about yourself?
Participant: I think maybe I learned that, you know, being a little bit spontaneous, kind letting go of any you know, an urge to take a really strong grip on the process. I think it. I think that was one of the first paintings where I just kind of let it happen. And felt that that was better than trying to control the experiences. And the other part of the question?
Interviewer: The other part of the question? It was just what did you learn from the process? And did you learn anything about yourself?
Participant: I I don't know that I've learned anything long term, but I feel like it was an expression of confidence that I so that was, I guess, part of the satisfaction was recognizing that I did have that in me occasionally.
Interviewer: Has anyone else seen it?
Participant: Oh, yeah.
Interviewer: How did others receive the work? What were their reactions?
Participant: I think everybody thought it was, you know pretty cool, pretty impressive, I had it hanging in my home since then.
I gave it away maybe four years ago and she has it hanging in her house. I guess I don't know if it's still there, but she's having some pictures after she had one, but I’ll have to check, I think was kind of funny, because, you know, you're friend friendly, but not great friends, and I I have given away most of my life, and the second time is about 4 years ago. Oh, actually, it was about 8 years ago. You know, anyway, the fact that she would hang that in her living room. You know where she, we're super close, so I and she's a very good artist, so it's a huge compliment
Interviewer: Definitely, especially considering it's a self portrait of you that she has displayed in her space.
Do you think that the artist intended the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Interviewer: Did you intend for the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Participant: Well, I guess this is something I'm trying to get away from that. I I think most creative people are always have one part of their mind thinking about how it will be received. So, I'm sure I was thinking in that way at the time, where you kind of both doing it for yourself, but also to you know, for some kind of reaction from other people.
Did your experience with the artwork affect your understanding of others or “the world?”
Interviewer: Did your experience affect your understanding of others or the world?
Participant: I don't know if I learned anything about anyone else, but probably learned that in the world that I think things just kind of happen like I don't know that I've taken any real
strong pride in almost anything I've created. I feel like. So things just kind of happen, and I'm just kind of there for it. So maybe some yeah sense that you kind of get lucky from time to time.
When some people think about themselves, they see some parts of themselves as deeply true, real, or authentic.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process of interacting with the artwork? Did you have any insights about your own authentic (or inauthentic) self?
Interviewer: When some people think about themselves they see some parts of themselves as deeply true, real or authentic.If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process? Did you have any insights about your own authentic or inauthentic self?
Participant: So I would say maybe kind of a lesson of the sense of self more like just being at a point in time where this happened. Where you know, I don't know that I caused it. Is there any great intent, or I know I had developed some talent by then, but, like I said, this was unlike anything I've done before. So it just seemed like I was in the right place at the right time.
Some people believe in ultimate meaning. This is defined as deep, underlying meaning that transcends subjective, personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significance of suffering, as well as spirituality.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: some people believe in ultimate meeting. This is defined as deep underlying meaning that transcends subjective personal meeting. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significance of suffering as well as spirituality. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process?
Participant: Well, I guess I don't really believe in ultimate meaning just like the universe you enforce.
Interviewer: Yeah, that makes sense.
Some people believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs/experiences (such as perceived interactions with God) but also may include mystical or transcendent experiences, or interaction with spirits.
Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the interaction with the artwork?
Interviewer: Some people believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs or experiences such as perceived interactions with God, but may also include mystical or transcendent experiences or interaction with spirits. Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the creation of the work?
Participant: No, probably not anything having to do with spirituality, really just the universe.
Interviewer: So. Even if you did not have an experience like what was previously described, you may have felt some sort of inspiration, guidance, or encouragement from a non physical or supernatural, or you may have felt some sense of presence or connection. Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the creation of the work?
Participant: No sense of presence, because I don't believe that anything in the spiritual world and like consider that. Maybe a connection is just being a portion of the universe is feeling like. Yeah. You know one tiny thread of everything that is.
What was going on in your life during the interaction?
Interviewer: And just a follow up question. Was there anything in particular going on in your life around the time that you created the piece.
Participant: Well, it was wherever it was within that 3 year portion, I, it was a portion of transition for me.I was either. That's beginning my first romantic relationship can't recall
my mid twenties, but I just probably gotten out of some schooling, and it's trying to find some little bit of a
transitional time.
Conclusion
Interviewer: Well, that was great. Thank you.
The participant chose to discuss a self-portrait that they painted.They chose to discuss this work because it was a surprisingly easy process that resulted in one of their best creations. Art has always been part of their life, but they created this work alone during a time where they had been studying art. Throughout the creation, they got lost in the process, but ultimately were satisfied with the result. There was steady incremental growth throughout the creation, which is unusual for the participant. This change in the creative process taught them that it’s okay to be spontaneous and have less control over the process, which also increased their confidence.
Others who saw the artwork received it well; one individual they aren’t very close with even hung it up in their home. They think they primarily created it for themselves, but believe they considered how others would react to it. They felt like they were “at the right place at the right time” when creating the painting and feel prideful of the piece. While they don’t believe in ultimate meaning and had no supernatural encounters, the creation of this painting made them feel like part of the universe as “one tiny thread of everything that is.”
Interview Transcript
Introduction
Interviewer: Okay. In this interview we are interested in asking you to tell us about an artwork that you created. We're going to ask you to describe this experience in detail. Do you have any questions?
[ Participant shakes head no ]
Description
Interviewer: Okay. We'd like you to think about an artwork that you created? That's especially meaningful to you. Your artwork could be from any of the following domains: painting, drawing, sculpture, stained glass, installation, music, songs, dance, performance art, film, literature, theater, fashion, mixed media, furniture, design, interior design, or any other our form we have not mentioned. The artwork does not necessarily have to be the most important to you, but it should be meaningful and mostly salient. It helps if your memories about creating the work or more vivid. So it's okay. If you don't, remember everything. It can be a work that you created at any age. Please choose your work and tell me what it is.
Participant: Would you prefer? I talked about the one that I learned about, or something that I have helpful, I could.
Interviewer: Whatever is easiest for you.
Participant: It's probably the one about this self portrait.
Interviewer: Okay. Can you? Just if you have it with you, can you show it?
Participant: Yeah. Just I don't have the actual piece, but I have an image of it hopefully. It will show up for you. You can see that
Interviewer: It's a beautiful piece.
Participant: Thanks.
Interviewer: So can you describe it for me and say any important details you'd like to note about it?
Participant: I believe it is 3 by 4 feet, so it's pretty big. It's acrylic paint. I think I wrote down what year I figured out, but I think it was probably around 2021 or 23, so I was probably in my early 30s. I did it in my mom's basement. I had been living with her briefly after getting some schooling that I was doing. I had a mirror set up, so it was done from life. I was dressed the way I've depicted in the Green Army jacket that I had in the image of myself was, you know, taken from what I was seeing, but it really looked like me. I'd say it's much more illustrated, more kind of expressive of me rather than anything.
Why did you choose this one? (Specialness)
Interviewer: Why did you choose this one to talk about?
Participant: I've always felt like it was one of my best paintings, and I'm not really sure how it happened. It's uhh it happened pretty quickly, and I would say very easily. I did very little editing. Usually I paint over endless, you know, several to dozens of times before I'm happy with it. And this just kind of came together within a single session that was made going to three hours long so like I really captured something that you know I hadn't intended to do, but not.
Process of Creation
What led up to the creation? What motivated you to create this piece?
Interviewer: Now please tell me about the experience and process of creating the work by answering the following series of questions. Sorry if any of this gets repetitive. If it's something you've already mentioned, you can just ask to move on to the next part. What led up to its creation, and what motivated you to create it?
Participant: Well, I was studying art at the time. I had taken some painting classes that kind of the county community college. And then shortly after that, I lived on my own, where I was in quite a bit, and then, after that I went to school for graphic design, and I can't really remember with where in that about 3 year period I did this, but art was always a part of my life.
When and where did the experience happen? Who was involved besides you (if anyone)?
Interviewer: So you already talked about when and where it happened. But was anybody else involved in the creation?
Participant: No, it was just myself
What were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process of interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: What were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process of creating the work? For example, at the beginning, middle, and end.
Participant: At the beginning I was probably thinking about the second thing I learned about drawing my life. I would say in the middle, which is people of most of my better paintings that I probably kinda got lost in it where I was really thinking about anything which is in the Us. And the the doing of it. I don't need track of time ending up to something. I like. It's also kind of a thinking by the end I was probably I would I don't know that I'd say elated, but close to great satisfaction.
Can you describe any high points, low points or challenges, or turning points along the way?
Interviewer: Can you describe any high points, low points, or turning points along the way?
Participant: I think it was just a pretty steady climb from blank canvas to a successful piece I know that it was.
It's just kind of a constant incremental growth, which again, if I chose, this is that a little unusual?
Let's talk a little bit about the impact of the artwork on you and your life.
What did you learn from the process of interacting with the artwork? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Interviewer: Now let's talk about the impact of the artwork on yourself and others. What did you learn from the process of creating the work? And did you learn anything about yourself?
Participant: I think maybe I learned that, you know, being a little bit spontaneous, kind letting go of any you know, an urge to take a really strong grip on the process. I think it. I think that was one of the first paintings where I just kind of let it happen. And felt that that was better than trying to control the experiences. And the other part of the question?
Interviewer: The other part of the question? It was just what did you learn from the process? And did you learn anything about yourself?
Participant: I I don't know that I've learned anything long term, but I feel like it was an expression of confidence that I so that was, I guess, part of the satisfaction was recognizing that I did have that in me occasionally.
Interviewer: Has anyone else seen it?
Participant: Oh, yeah.
Interviewer: How did others receive the work? What were their reactions?
Participant: I think everybody thought it was, you know pretty cool, pretty impressive, I had it hanging in my home since then.
I gave it away maybe four years ago and she has it hanging in her house. I guess I don't know if it's still there, but she's having some pictures after she had one, but I’ll have to check, I think was kind of funny, because, you know, you're friend friendly, but not great friends, and I I have given away most of my life, and the second time is about 4 years ago. Oh, actually, it was about 8 years ago. You know, anyway, the fact that she would hang that in her living room. You know where she, we're super close, so I and she's a very good artist, so it's a huge compliment
Interviewer: Definitely, especially considering it's a self portrait of you that she has displayed in her space.
Do you think that the artist intended the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Interviewer: Did you intend for the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Participant: Well, I guess this is something I'm trying to get away from that. I I think most creative people are always have one part of their mind thinking about how it will be received. So, I'm sure I was thinking in that way at the time, where you kind of both doing it for yourself, but also to you know, for some kind of reaction from other people.
Did your experience with the artwork affect your understanding of others or “the world?”
Interviewer: Did your experience affect your understanding of others or the world?
Participant: I don't know if I learned anything about anyone else, but probably learned that in the world that I think things just kind of happen like I don't know that I've taken any real
strong pride in almost anything I've created. I feel like. So things just kind of happen, and I'm just kind of there for it. So maybe some yeah sense that you kind of get lucky from time to time.
When some people think about themselves, they see some parts of themselves as deeply true, real, or authentic.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process of interacting with the artwork? Did you have any insights about your own authentic (or inauthentic) self?
Interviewer: When some people think about themselves they see some parts of themselves as deeply true, real or authentic.If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process? Did you have any insights about your own authentic or inauthentic self?
Participant: So I would say maybe kind of a lesson of the sense of self more like just being at a point in time where this happened. Where you know, I don't know that I caused it. Is there any great intent, or I know I had developed some talent by then, but, like I said, this was unlike anything I've done before. So it just seemed like I was in the right place at the right time.
Some people believe in ultimate meaning. This is defined as deep, underlying meaning that transcends subjective, personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significance of suffering, as well as spirituality.
If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of interacting with the artwork?
Interviewer: some people believe in ultimate meeting. This is defined as deep underlying meaning that transcends subjective personal meeting. It is about the nature of existence and identity, and it may include ideas about the significance of suffering as well as spirituality. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process?
Participant: Well, I guess I don't really believe in ultimate meaning just like the universe you enforce.
Interviewer: Yeah, that makes sense.
Some people believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs/experiences (such as perceived interactions with God) but also may include mystical or transcendent experiences, or interaction with spirits.
Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the interaction with the artwork?
Interviewer: Some people believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs or experiences such as perceived interactions with God, but may also include mystical or transcendent experiences or interaction with spirits. Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the creation of the work?
Participant: No, probably not anything having to do with spirituality, really just the universe.
Interviewer: So. Even if you did not have an experience like what was previously described, you may have felt some sort of inspiration, guidance, or encouragement from a non physical or supernatural, or you may have felt some sense of presence or connection. Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the creation of the work?
Participant: No sense of presence, because I don't believe that anything in the spiritual world and like consider that. Maybe a connection is just being a portion of the universe is feeling like. Yeah. You know one tiny thread of everything that is.
What was going on in your life during the interaction?
Interviewer: And just a follow up question. Was there anything in particular going on in your life around the time that you created the piece.
Participant: Well, it was wherever it was within that 3 year portion, I, it was a portion of transition for me.I was either. That's beginning my first romantic relationship can't recall
my mid twenties, but I just probably gotten out of some schooling, and it's trying to find some little bit of a
transitional time.
Conclusion
Interviewer: Well, that was great. Thank you.
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