Yajayra Franco discussed creating the lighting design for a production of the musical, Godspell
Interview Summary
The participant chose to discuss a lighting design they created for a production of Godspell, a musical based on Jesus and his life. They chose to talk about this artwork because it was one they were deeply connected to on an emotional and spiritual level. They think that lighting design is a unique form of art because of the emotion and dimension it adds to a piece, although it is often overlooked. Throughout creating the lighting design, they were motivated to stick to the Scripture and tried to make it biblically accurate. Other people involved included those from different production departments. While they especially enjoyed working with members of the lighting department, who were very supportive, they found themselves disagreeing with the director’s portrayal of Jesus and the direction they were taking the show in. This disagreement was a low point for them, but they also noted feeling excitement to be involved with the project, enjoying the community they worked with, and being emotionally moved by their own work for the first time.
Throughout the experience, they learned about themselves as an artist, specifically that they can overdo things at times while creating and that they have a natural “eye for color” when designing lighting. They were driven to move people emotionally when creating this art, and had success in receiving positive reactions, such as people mentioning their favorite lighting moment and when their sister cried because she was so moved by the work. Regarding others, they learned about different perceptions of what spirituality is, such as peers possibly looking down on the work initially because of the subject matter or the director moving away from the religious aspect, possibly because of their own negative experiences. They also mentioned that during this time, their family had separated from religion, which was very upsetting to the participant and led them to use this creation as a distraction from that. Despite this, the participant had many perceived encounters with God and Jesus throughout their time working on this project, and ultimately felt more connected to their spirituality.
Interview Transcript
Introduction
Interviewer: Okay, so in this interview we're interested in asking you to tell us about an artwork that you created, and the artwork doesn't have to be the most important to you. But it should be meaningful and emotionally salient. It helps if your memories are vivid. But it's okay, if you don't remember anything.
Description
Interviewer: So I know you've chosen your artwork to talk about. So what is it?
Participant: So it's my lighting design for a theater, for a musical called God spell, that’s my artwork.
Interviewer: Yeah. And then this question may be a little bit tricky. But sometimes we ask participants to show the artwork. I'm not sure. If you could, would be able to share it in some form.
Participant: Yeah I can.
Interviewer: Okay, yeah. How would you like to share it?
Participant: Yeah. Do you want me to share my screen, or?
Interviewer: Yeah that would work well, let me set that up.
Participant: Cool. Okay, great. Okay. So these are just some images, I guess I'll scroll through, but yeah. And then do you want me to? Is there any other questions? Do I just talk about it, or?
Interviewer: Yeah, so I'll be reading from a script and I'll be asking some questions, and then you'll be able to respond. So, can you describe this for me? So what are some of the important details?
Participant: Yeah, I think the main detail about this is that it's a musical about Jesus and his life here on earth told in like, in a very animated way, obviously. And just, it was really important to me because I myself am like a Christian, and the fact that I was able to work on a piece that connected with me on like a spiritual level was very exciting for me. Yes, I, I guess that would be like the main, the main detail about if I had anything to say
Why did you choose this one? (Specialness)
Interviewer: Great. And then why did you choose this one to talk about for this study?
Participant: Because it really, I chose this one because it really affected me. In a spiritual sense it's the most I've ever been connected, in the work I've created at least, the most I've been connected not only emotionally, and, but also spiritually like I felt a connection, and just like some type of like spiritual passion for it in, in knowing that this was a way for me to like, a form of worship for me. And like a form of like acknowledgment and like gratefulness that I can, that my form of worship is through lighting design, and just being able to share this experience with an audience and capturing the emotional moments of the show, and of who Jesus was. Yeah.
Distinguishing Features
Interviewer: Great. And then is there something about a lighting design that's meaningful or distinguishing? As compared to other art forms and media.
Participant: Yeah, it's, I feel like it's something that if you pay close attention to it, it’s just something about it. It's just like it, like attractive, like it can move you in a certain way that, not saying other art forms can't do it, but it just adds element. It, it adds emotion, and it adds, what's the word? Dimension to a piece, whatever it may be, whether it's at a concert, or you know, like a theater show, in a movie. Sometimes it's overlooked, overlooked. But when you pay close attention to it, and you kind of ground yourself in like how the lighting supports like the space for the scene or the frame. It kind of like, just gives some more depth to whatever it is that you may looking, may be looking at. Like, for example, a piece at like a gallery in the Art Gallery Museum, the way it's like is also has purpose or intention of like, how you experience the piece
What led up to its creation? What motivated you to create it?
Interviewer: Great. And then could you tell me a little bit about the process of creating this artwork by answering the following questions: So what led up to its creation? What motivated you to create it?
Participant: I would definitely say my main motivation was to stick not only to the script, but sticking to the Scripture as well, because the script of the show was based on the Scripture, and so I would pretty much use the Bible as, as a motivation by cross-referencing it, making sure that it was accurate. And in whatever way Jesus was portrayed, it was accurate, so that was my main motivation, making sure that, that whatever was on stage was biblical and true and honest I would say.
Interviewer: And then do you think that there is something that wanted or needed to be expressed through this lighting design?
Participant: I would say it'd be between 2 things. It would be love and peace. Above all, I think that's what I, I wanted to portray through the light is love and peace, and to demonstrate who Jesus was, because people sometimes have like you know, different perceptions of of who Jesus was, but like above all, through my lighting, I wanted to show love, and peace.
When and where did the work happen? Who was involved besides you (if anyone)?
Interviewer: And then when and where did the work happen on the lighting design? And who is involved besides you, if anybody?
Participant: Umm it happened last year, wait not last year, it happened this year in the spring, I believe April and it happened here at USC in a black box theater. And who was involved? Well, musical theater students. The pictures here are musical theater students, in their third year, I believe. Director, sound designer, well, I was going to say costume designer, but there wasn’t a costume designer, choreographer, stage manager, of course, how could I forget? But yeah, pretty much other production departments to make sure that this piece happened at the right exact moments and cues were being called, and it's like this specific moment was called on time. Yeah, just different people that helped make the show what it is.
What were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process?
Interviewer: And then, what were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process of creating this lighting design?
Participant: Yes, so I, at the beginning of the process, I was really excited. I was like, oh, my goodness! I have an opportunity to use my work and tell Jesus’s story. So I was super excited, but then, during the process, during more discussions with your, with the director, I got less excited and more disconnected only because the approach he was taking with the show was different than what I had in mind. So I thought we were going to approach the show like true and like to the script and to the Scripture as well like, okay, this is the story of Jesus’s coming. And you know, just, just spreading love and peace and joy. But he wanted to take it, he, and some people could say that what I was thinking was kind of like in a religious sense, that's how I wanted to approach it Which I guess that could be said, but the director wanted it to approach it in a more teaching way. So, as you can see back here, it says, I don’t know if you can read it, it says detention, lesson: philosophy, substitute: Jesus Christ. He wanted to approach it in a classroom setting that Jesus was like a substitute teacher and these people were like His students. Sorry, what was the question again? I forgot.
Interviewer: Yeah, that's great. I mean, I was asking just about in general, what were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout?
Participant: Yeah. So like I said. In the beginning I was excited. Towards the middle of the process, I was not as excited, and I was kind of a little frustrated, because to me the, the vision of the director didn't make sense to me. Because why would, if we're in a classroom setting, why is the substitute teacher being crucified at the end of the show? I'm like, okay, that, okay… You know I can't say your ideas are dumb, but like I, I can't say that because it's the director's show. So that's how I felt. And when it came to actually creating this piece it was, again frustrating because I was trying to ground this show based off of the director's vision. It was getting frustrating because it didn't make sense to me. I'm like this is a story of Jesus. But sometimes, somehow, I have to apply it to like a real teacher that's trying to teach a class and we're in a classroom setting. So how, how? And I was disconnected. I was frustrated. That spiritual connection I had at the very beginning wasn't there anymore because I, I was just trying to get it done for the director rather than for me and my own goals or my desires. And then, opening night, came. So it was opening night. And I went to opening night, and I sat in the audience, and it was the first time I was able to experience my own show rather than as an audience member than a designer, and going through the show and like watching it, like I was surprised by the stuff that I did. And I've never been like emotionally moved by my own work, because usually when I watch a show that I've done, I'm like, oh, that looks bad, or oh this and that, like I start critiquing it. But when I saw it I was like, oh, wow! Like this, I did a good job in amplifying or like demonstrating who Jesus was, and like whatever emotions he was going through at specific times. Like, for example, this moment. There's a moment of Jesus being crucified. And I'm like Wow! This is like very dramatic, and like very painful to see and it kind of hurts seeing it. And this other moment, when the woman was about to be stoned because she committed adultery like, I don't know why the file is like very, it's very desaturated, like I don't know where the colors at, but there's supposed to be more color. But just seeing it, experiencing it, was was different, like I've never been so moved by my own stuff, and I, I think I did a good job in demonstrating who Jesus was which is just helping carry the story throughout.
Can you describe any high points, low points or challenges, or turning points along the way?
Interviewer: Great Thank you. And then would you like to talk any more about any high points, low points, or challenges or turning points in the process of creating this lighting design?
Participant: I mean, I guess I have another high point would be, I think, what also makes this my favorite or my memorable show I've done is just the community I was around with. Like the specific lighting department, they were just really excited and very passionate about the lighting. I, I guess I would say a high point, too, even though I was like having frustrations and like getting, having artist's block because of the director's vision. The group of people I was with, like my assistant lighting designer, and, like the port operator, we were just cracking jokes, having fun, and they just, you know, if there was a cool, lighting moment, or whatever they would like, look over at me, nudge me and say like that's amazing. I guess I would say it's a high point. I mean not to be mean, but I guess the low points I would say, was whenever the director's vision would like clash with mine, because i'm like no, I, I wish we could tell the story like straightforward how it is, and showing who Jesus was, but he wanted to like overshadow the religious element.
What did you learn from the process of creating this artwork? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Interviewer: Thank you. So let's talk about the impact of the artwork on yourself and others. What did you learn from the process of creating this lighting design? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Participant: Yeah, I, I learned about myself as an artist. Specifically that sometimes I tend to overdo things. And having the pressure, and that was because I would feel the pressure of okay I have to constantly engage the audience, make sure that they're paying attention, make sure that they're engaged with the work, and by that I would overdo it by making so many lighting looks, so many lighting cues. So I learned that about myself, that sometimes I tend to overdo it, and when the director calls me out, and it's saying that there's too much happening that it's kind of distracting. And so I was like, okay, that makes sense. And so I kind of like, sat and reflected in that, telling myself like, hey, it's okay, just sometimes let the piece breathe. Let the actors do what they have to do like, yes, I'm there to support them, and, you know artistically, but same time, like don’t overshine them, outshine them with your light. So I learned that about myself, to just dial it back. It's okay. Let it breathe. And then, aside from that is, you know, I also learned that the experience it is, and who I am when it comes to a piece that I'm super passionate about like I've never that passion that I experienced, and just having that connection with God, and like thanking Him, and meditating in Him, and like kind of Him giving me revelation and edifying me through this time was very powerful, because I've never had that. Like I said, like thousands of times, had that spiritual connection with God while working on a piece and I think that's something I would like to experience more in whatever sense, as long as there’s you know, connection. Not only outside of the work, but within the work as well, and within the space and just seeing a connection with the piece in a spiritual sense, is something I learned about myself, and is definitely something I would want to experience with, and hopefully, experience with other groups of people as well. It's not just myself.
How did others receive the artwork? For example, what were their reactions? Did you intend the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Interviewer: Great, thank you. And then you've already touched on these questions. But I wanted to know if you want to say more about how others received the artwork, their reactions. And then, if you intended for the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Participant: Right, so one thing, the one person that comes to mind is my younger sister. She loves theater and so she's happy that I get to work in this industry because she kind of gets free shows because of me. So when she came to watch the show with me on opening night, after the show, she was saying that she cried at very specific moments. And that moved me because I'm like, okay, so it's working. So what I do is, you know it is emotionally moving people and so much so that she like posted about it, saying like, oh, my goodness, good job to my sister. She did amazing. She made me cry. And that's, I would say, is one of the, kind of like the highlights as like as long as I made my family cry, as long as they enjoyed it and they were moved ,like I did my job. Not saying the others maybe, probably didn’t. But, like, I, my target audience is usually mostly my family first. So that felt good, and then friends and family too well friends, and like peers, when they would see the show, or as I was working on the show, faculty would come up to me, and they would say, oh, by the way, this is my favorite lighting moment, I love it. Like, I think someone said that this was your favorite moment, the one you see on screen. And my stage manager would say, and I forgot what other moment, but she would say, oh, I love this look like I would always be told like the look, the lighting look would be their favorite one. Someone, Someone always had a favorite like that, and they would come up to me and say, this is my favorite moment. So those are some other interactions, and, and it's obviously a blessing, because I'm not doing it or I, I wasn't doing it to show off. I never really do it to show off and be like oh, I'm the best, I'm good, but it's mostly to, you know, make sure that the story is told, and the audience receives it in a good way, or the way that it's intended to be. So I would say that was, those are some interactions or experiences from other people. And I'm glad most of my peers like enjoyed it, because at first, when I, when I told people that I was assigned to design this show, they were like, oh, you got Godspell? And I’m like yes, and I, and to be fair, I never like heard of Godspell when they gave it to me. They're like oh… the music isn't that good. I was like, oh, okay. And so that kind of like made me feel a little bad that they were like, oh…. That they kind of felt pity for me that I got this show, but in the end, like I don't care. I'm glad I got the show, and I was able to work on it.
Did your experience affect your understanding of others or “the world”?
Interviewer: Great, Thank you. And then did your experience affect your understanding of other people or the world?
Participant: Hmm. I guess so. It, it would be at how people interact with, I guess, it would be knowing different people's perception of what spirituality is, or religion is and how they approach it, whether it's because of their own experiences, or, yeah, because the way the director approached it kind of like, open my eyes a bit as to like how as to like why the director might have approached it the way that he did. Could have been that maybe he was uncomfortable with the religious aspect, maybe he had a bad experience with the religious aspect that he tried to like move away from that. And same with other peers too, like the reason as to like why they kind of felt pity for me that I got this show, you know, it probably could have been, whatever perception they have of like Christianity or religion specifically, that made them feel pity for me. And, and kind of them being surprised that they enjoyed the show too considering the script, kind of like open my eyes a bit, and made me realize that, like what, how others perceived this piece, and kind of made me a little curious as to why.
Did you have any insights about your own authentic (or inauthentic) self?
Interviewer: Great thank you. And so, when some people think about themselves. They see some parts of themselves as deeply true, real, or authentic. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process? Did you have any insights about your own authentic or inauthentic self?
Participant: Hmm. I think when it comes to lighting specifically, I learned about myself mostly in an artistic manner because I was this, this was my, I think this is my second show on campus and I remember one night I stayed late with my assistant because we were working on the show, because it's a musical like, obviously it's a musical, there's just so much you have to do that one of my friends came over to the space with us and I was picking color, and she was like amazed. She was like, oh my goodness, what you do to pick these colors? They’re so amazing! And so I guess one thing I, I learned about myself with this piece was that I have an eye for color, even though I don't pay attention to it. I just like I, I can be pretty good at like putting colors together and making it visually appealing and for, for others it may be kind of like a difficult thing, but, it comes naturally to me, even though I, I don't try to like, I don't know, but I don't know how to explain it. But I guess that would be one thing that I came to realization while working this pieces that I, I have an eye for color and color excites me and yeah.
Did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process?
Interviewer: Great. Thank you. so some people believe in ultimate meaning. This is defined as deep underlying meaning that transcends subjective, personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity. It may include ideas about the significance of suffering as well as spirituality. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of creating this lighting design?
Participant: Hmm. Oh, yeah, 100%. It would just be, I learned that, light itself, I mean clearly if I'm pursuing it as an art form that it's its own art like whether you know in nature and I learned, I learned that the artistry I take from the outside world God created, whether the sunlight, the moonlight, is what I'm trying to take in into the space and trying to replicate. So I definitely learn about about that. That inspiration I take is not of, or the what I make is not my own like it's obviously it's not original, because I try my best to replicate what's out there like the true form of artistry outside, and bring it inside and try to bring in, pull out those emotional moments we might not acknowledge while we're out in nature, but bringing them inside. Does that answer the question?
Interviewer: Yeah. Great, that's great. Thank you.
Perceptions of reality beyond the physical world.
Interviewer: So the next question is, some people believe, believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs and experiences such as perceived interactions with God. But also may include mystical or transcendent experiences or interactions with spirits. Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the creation of this lighting design?
Participant: Oh, yeah, 100%. I, yeah, it would definitely be, definitely during the early process of it, when I was engaging with the script and during, well watching this by watching my own show. In the early process, it would be that, that connection, and like listening to the soundtrack for the original recording of the musical, and like basing it off of the Scripture, just cross-referencing, and like listening to the lyrics of the songs and then basing it off of the Scripture was like, was kind of like seeing it come to life in a sense. Because like, oh, wow! This is what, this is probably what Jesus was going through emotionally and this is probably what the people surrounding Jesus and are following Jesus, were experiencing, and like seeing the questions that they had in the musical and like tying it back to the questions that people had in Scripture. So, so that was interesting, seeing it kind of like come to life, come to fruition as to what it was like. And as for actually seeing it, I felt that going through the show, I felt the emotional, kind of like out, I don’t know if turmoil is the right word, but pretty much what Jesus went through and what, this is the actress that played Jesus, and she kind of like really took his persona really well like it just made you feel for who Jesus was. There was definitely a sense of like having that emotional connection with Jesus. And I've seen, you know, for me growing up in church, I've seen many, you know, renditions, or like types of media that demonstrate the life of Jesus. And not all of them hit, if that makes sense, like emotionally, only a few have, and the fact that I think, because I was able to see this live did something, and being in the room experiencing this, did something to me. I definitely having an experience with with Jesus during this moment the Last Supper and when Jesus was saying goodbye to to all the other characters there. And when he was being betrayed as well, it was just so much. I would say that was like the, the direct connection that I had, and just feeling, having that discernment of what Jesus was going through, specifically the sermon that I've never like experienced before, compared to watching like passion of the Christ, or like other types of media renditions of Jesus’s life.
Interviewer: Thank you. I just have a couple of quick follow-up. Questions.
How old were you?
Interviewer: So how old were you when you created this lighting design?
Participant: I was, wait let me go back to the date, I should have that. I hope I do. Spring 2022, so I was 21.
Interviewer: Okay, great.
Life events
Interviewer: And would you like to say anything about what was going on in your life around the time that you created this lighting design?
Participant: What was going on? Hmm. Okay. I might get emotional saying this, but during this time is when I kind of like hit a point, or acknowledged that my family’s, my parents specifically, their spirituality or their connection to God was waning, like they were just drifting and I guess that's during that time, this show was kind of a distraction. And like, I try not to think about it too much as to who my parents were becoming as they were kind of like leaving church for whatever reasons like they have, because I think this show served as a distraction, and like kind of like a grounding moment, like a foundation to stay true and to hold onto God, no matter what because that was definitely a painful time, and like noticing that and acknowledging it. And it's, and during this time I haven't seen my parents in a long time for that very reason, and not kind of like, not wanting to acknowledge or like face the fact that they themselves, their spiritual selves, they were drifting. So, that was kind of like something emotional or mentally that I was going through. And so when this show was given to me. I, you know, I took it, and I was like, okay, that's why I used it for on as a distraction. And as a reminder, you know, to ground myself in Jesus and in God that, you know, he's important, he's true. And you know, if I wouldn't be who I am, or like my life could be this so much so, like in a different direction, or I would not be where I am right now if you know if I didn’t confide in Him this kind of like solidifying that he's true, he's real, and he's always looking over me. He's always protecting me even through, like those emotional moments, emotional turmoil, and like thinking back to my family and how they're not really living a life with God as much anymore. So this definitely came like in handy, and the fact that my parents came to see it. I don't know, I just, I didn't think about it too much, because I didn't want to. But just hoping that they experienced that connection too, and that it reminded them of who Jesus and what he can do, and kind of like, hopefully that they were able to reflect, of their lives, and who, their sense of being and who they were when they were, had that direct connection, the strong spiritual connection for Jesus.
Interviewer: Great. Yeah, thank you so much for sharing everything.
The participant chose to discuss a lighting design they created for a production of Godspell, a musical based on Jesus and his life. They chose to talk about this artwork because it was one they were deeply connected to on an emotional and spiritual level. They think that lighting design is a unique form of art because of the emotion and dimension it adds to a piece, although it is often overlooked. Throughout creating the lighting design, they were motivated to stick to the Scripture and tried to make it biblically accurate. Other people involved included those from different production departments. While they especially enjoyed working with members of the lighting department, who were very supportive, they found themselves disagreeing with the director’s portrayal of Jesus and the direction they were taking the show in. This disagreement was a low point for them, but they also noted feeling excitement to be involved with the project, enjoying the community they worked with, and being emotionally moved by their own work for the first time.
Throughout the experience, they learned about themselves as an artist, specifically that they can overdo things at times while creating and that they have a natural “eye for color” when designing lighting. They were driven to move people emotionally when creating this art, and had success in receiving positive reactions, such as people mentioning their favorite lighting moment and when their sister cried because she was so moved by the work. Regarding others, they learned about different perceptions of what spirituality is, such as peers possibly looking down on the work initially because of the subject matter or the director moving away from the religious aspect, possibly because of their own negative experiences. They also mentioned that during this time, their family had separated from religion, which was very upsetting to the participant and led them to use this creation as a distraction from that. Despite this, the participant had many perceived encounters with God and Jesus throughout their time working on this project, and ultimately felt more connected to their spirituality.
Interview Transcript
Introduction
Interviewer: Okay, so in this interview we're interested in asking you to tell us about an artwork that you created, and the artwork doesn't have to be the most important to you. But it should be meaningful and emotionally salient. It helps if your memories are vivid. But it's okay, if you don't remember anything.
Description
Interviewer: So I know you've chosen your artwork to talk about. So what is it?
Participant: So it's my lighting design for a theater, for a musical called God spell, that’s my artwork.
Interviewer: Yeah. And then this question may be a little bit tricky. But sometimes we ask participants to show the artwork. I'm not sure. If you could, would be able to share it in some form.
Participant: Yeah I can.
Interviewer: Okay, yeah. How would you like to share it?
Participant: Yeah. Do you want me to share my screen, or?
Interviewer: Yeah that would work well, let me set that up.
Participant: Cool. Okay, great. Okay. So these are just some images, I guess I'll scroll through, but yeah. And then do you want me to? Is there any other questions? Do I just talk about it, or?
Interviewer: Yeah, so I'll be reading from a script and I'll be asking some questions, and then you'll be able to respond. So, can you describe this for me? So what are some of the important details?
Participant: Yeah, I think the main detail about this is that it's a musical about Jesus and his life here on earth told in like, in a very animated way, obviously. And just, it was really important to me because I myself am like a Christian, and the fact that I was able to work on a piece that connected with me on like a spiritual level was very exciting for me. Yes, I, I guess that would be like the main, the main detail about if I had anything to say
Why did you choose this one? (Specialness)
Interviewer: Great. And then why did you choose this one to talk about for this study?
Participant: Because it really, I chose this one because it really affected me. In a spiritual sense it's the most I've ever been connected, in the work I've created at least, the most I've been connected not only emotionally, and, but also spiritually like I felt a connection, and just like some type of like spiritual passion for it in, in knowing that this was a way for me to like, a form of worship for me. And like a form of like acknowledgment and like gratefulness that I can, that my form of worship is through lighting design, and just being able to share this experience with an audience and capturing the emotional moments of the show, and of who Jesus was. Yeah.
Distinguishing Features
Interviewer: Great. And then is there something about a lighting design that's meaningful or distinguishing? As compared to other art forms and media.
Participant: Yeah, it's, I feel like it's something that if you pay close attention to it, it’s just something about it. It's just like it, like attractive, like it can move you in a certain way that, not saying other art forms can't do it, but it just adds element. It, it adds emotion, and it adds, what's the word? Dimension to a piece, whatever it may be, whether it's at a concert, or you know, like a theater show, in a movie. Sometimes it's overlooked, overlooked. But when you pay close attention to it, and you kind of ground yourself in like how the lighting supports like the space for the scene or the frame. It kind of like, just gives some more depth to whatever it is that you may looking, may be looking at. Like, for example, a piece at like a gallery in the Art Gallery Museum, the way it's like is also has purpose or intention of like, how you experience the piece
What led up to its creation? What motivated you to create it?
Interviewer: Great. And then could you tell me a little bit about the process of creating this artwork by answering the following questions: So what led up to its creation? What motivated you to create it?
Participant: I would definitely say my main motivation was to stick not only to the script, but sticking to the Scripture as well, because the script of the show was based on the Scripture, and so I would pretty much use the Bible as, as a motivation by cross-referencing it, making sure that it was accurate. And in whatever way Jesus was portrayed, it was accurate, so that was my main motivation, making sure that, that whatever was on stage was biblical and true and honest I would say.
Interviewer: And then do you think that there is something that wanted or needed to be expressed through this lighting design?
Participant: I would say it'd be between 2 things. It would be love and peace. Above all, I think that's what I, I wanted to portray through the light is love and peace, and to demonstrate who Jesus was, because people sometimes have like you know, different perceptions of of who Jesus was, but like above all, through my lighting, I wanted to show love, and peace.
When and where did the work happen? Who was involved besides you (if anyone)?
Interviewer: And then when and where did the work happen on the lighting design? And who is involved besides you, if anybody?
Participant: Umm it happened last year, wait not last year, it happened this year in the spring, I believe April and it happened here at USC in a black box theater. And who was involved? Well, musical theater students. The pictures here are musical theater students, in their third year, I believe. Director, sound designer, well, I was going to say costume designer, but there wasn’t a costume designer, choreographer, stage manager, of course, how could I forget? But yeah, pretty much other production departments to make sure that this piece happened at the right exact moments and cues were being called, and it's like this specific moment was called on time. Yeah, just different people that helped make the show what it is.
What were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process?
Interviewer: And then, what were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout the process of creating this lighting design?
Participant: Yes, so I, at the beginning of the process, I was really excited. I was like, oh, my goodness! I have an opportunity to use my work and tell Jesus’s story. So I was super excited, but then, during the process, during more discussions with your, with the director, I got less excited and more disconnected only because the approach he was taking with the show was different than what I had in mind. So I thought we were going to approach the show like true and like to the script and to the Scripture as well like, okay, this is the story of Jesus’s coming. And you know, just, just spreading love and peace and joy. But he wanted to take it, he, and some people could say that what I was thinking was kind of like in a religious sense, that's how I wanted to approach it Which I guess that could be said, but the director wanted it to approach it in a more teaching way. So, as you can see back here, it says, I don’t know if you can read it, it says detention, lesson: philosophy, substitute: Jesus Christ. He wanted to approach it in a classroom setting that Jesus was like a substitute teacher and these people were like His students. Sorry, what was the question again? I forgot.
Interviewer: Yeah, that's great. I mean, I was asking just about in general, what were you thinking and feeling at different times throughout?
Participant: Yeah. So like I said. In the beginning I was excited. Towards the middle of the process, I was not as excited, and I was kind of a little frustrated, because to me the, the vision of the director didn't make sense to me. Because why would, if we're in a classroom setting, why is the substitute teacher being crucified at the end of the show? I'm like, okay, that, okay… You know I can't say your ideas are dumb, but like I, I can't say that because it's the director's show. So that's how I felt. And when it came to actually creating this piece it was, again frustrating because I was trying to ground this show based off of the director's vision. It was getting frustrating because it didn't make sense to me. I'm like this is a story of Jesus. But sometimes, somehow, I have to apply it to like a real teacher that's trying to teach a class and we're in a classroom setting. So how, how? And I was disconnected. I was frustrated. That spiritual connection I had at the very beginning wasn't there anymore because I, I was just trying to get it done for the director rather than for me and my own goals or my desires. And then, opening night, came. So it was opening night. And I went to opening night, and I sat in the audience, and it was the first time I was able to experience my own show rather than as an audience member than a designer, and going through the show and like watching it, like I was surprised by the stuff that I did. And I've never been like emotionally moved by my own work, because usually when I watch a show that I've done, I'm like, oh, that looks bad, or oh this and that, like I start critiquing it. But when I saw it I was like, oh, wow! Like this, I did a good job in amplifying or like demonstrating who Jesus was, and like whatever emotions he was going through at specific times. Like, for example, this moment. There's a moment of Jesus being crucified. And I'm like Wow! This is like very dramatic, and like very painful to see and it kind of hurts seeing it. And this other moment, when the woman was about to be stoned because she committed adultery like, I don't know why the file is like very, it's very desaturated, like I don't know where the colors at, but there's supposed to be more color. But just seeing it, experiencing it, was was different, like I've never been so moved by my own stuff, and I, I think I did a good job in demonstrating who Jesus was which is just helping carry the story throughout.
Can you describe any high points, low points or challenges, or turning points along the way?
Interviewer: Great Thank you. And then would you like to talk any more about any high points, low points, or challenges or turning points in the process of creating this lighting design?
Participant: I mean, I guess I have another high point would be, I think, what also makes this my favorite or my memorable show I've done is just the community I was around with. Like the specific lighting department, they were just really excited and very passionate about the lighting. I, I guess I would say a high point, too, even though I was like having frustrations and like getting, having artist's block because of the director's vision. The group of people I was with, like my assistant lighting designer, and, like the port operator, we were just cracking jokes, having fun, and they just, you know, if there was a cool, lighting moment, or whatever they would like, look over at me, nudge me and say like that's amazing. I guess I would say it's a high point. I mean not to be mean, but I guess the low points I would say, was whenever the director's vision would like clash with mine, because i'm like no, I, I wish we could tell the story like straightforward how it is, and showing who Jesus was, but he wanted to like overshadow the religious element.
What did you learn from the process of creating this artwork? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Interviewer: Thank you. So let's talk about the impact of the artwork on yourself and others. What did you learn from the process of creating this lighting design? Did you learn anything about yourself?
Participant: Yeah, I, I learned about myself as an artist. Specifically that sometimes I tend to overdo things. And having the pressure, and that was because I would feel the pressure of okay I have to constantly engage the audience, make sure that they're paying attention, make sure that they're engaged with the work, and by that I would overdo it by making so many lighting looks, so many lighting cues. So I learned that about myself, that sometimes I tend to overdo it, and when the director calls me out, and it's saying that there's too much happening that it's kind of distracting. And so I was like, okay, that makes sense. And so I kind of like, sat and reflected in that, telling myself like, hey, it's okay, just sometimes let the piece breathe. Let the actors do what they have to do like, yes, I'm there to support them, and, you know artistically, but same time, like don’t overshine them, outshine them with your light. So I learned that about myself, to just dial it back. It's okay. Let it breathe. And then, aside from that is, you know, I also learned that the experience it is, and who I am when it comes to a piece that I'm super passionate about like I've never that passion that I experienced, and just having that connection with God, and like thanking Him, and meditating in Him, and like kind of Him giving me revelation and edifying me through this time was very powerful, because I've never had that. Like I said, like thousands of times, had that spiritual connection with God while working on a piece and I think that's something I would like to experience more in whatever sense, as long as there’s you know, connection. Not only outside of the work, but within the work as well, and within the space and just seeing a connection with the piece in a spiritual sense, is something I learned about myself, and is definitely something I would want to experience with, and hopefully, experience with other groups of people as well. It's not just myself.
How did others receive the artwork? For example, what were their reactions? Did you intend the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Interviewer: Great, thank you. And then you've already touched on these questions. But I wanted to know if you want to say more about how others received the artwork, their reactions. And then, if you intended for the work to affect others or the world in any particular ways?
Participant: Right, so one thing, the one person that comes to mind is my younger sister. She loves theater and so she's happy that I get to work in this industry because she kind of gets free shows because of me. So when she came to watch the show with me on opening night, after the show, she was saying that she cried at very specific moments. And that moved me because I'm like, okay, so it's working. So what I do is, you know it is emotionally moving people and so much so that she like posted about it, saying like, oh, my goodness, good job to my sister. She did amazing. She made me cry. And that's, I would say, is one of the, kind of like the highlights as like as long as I made my family cry, as long as they enjoyed it and they were moved ,like I did my job. Not saying the others maybe, probably didn’t. But, like, I, my target audience is usually mostly my family first. So that felt good, and then friends and family too well friends, and like peers, when they would see the show, or as I was working on the show, faculty would come up to me, and they would say, oh, by the way, this is my favorite lighting moment, I love it. Like, I think someone said that this was your favorite moment, the one you see on screen. And my stage manager would say, and I forgot what other moment, but she would say, oh, I love this look like I would always be told like the look, the lighting look would be their favorite one. Someone, Someone always had a favorite like that, and they would come up to me and say, this is my favorite moment. So those are some other interactions, and, and it's obviously a blessing, because I'm not doing it or I, I wasn't doing it to show off. I never really do it to show off and be like oh, I'm the best, I'm good, but it's mostly to, you know, make sure that the story is told, and the audience receives it in a good way, or the way that it's intended to be. So I would say that was, those are some interactions or experiences from other people. And I'm glad most of my peers like enjoyed it, because at first, when I, when I told people that I was assigned to design this show, they were like, oh, you got Godspell? And I’m like yes, and I, and to be fair, I never like heard of Godspell when they gave it to me. They're like oh… the music isn't that good. I was like, oh, okay. And so that kind of like made me feel a little bad that they were like, oh…. That they kind of felt pity for me that I got this show, but in the end, like I don't care. I'm glad I got the show, and I was able to work on it.
Did your experience affect your understanding of others or “the world”?
Interviewer: Great, Thank you. And then did your experience affect your understanding of other people or the world?
Participant: Hmm. I guess so. It, it would be at how people interact with, I guess, it would be knowing different people's perception of what spirituality is, or religion is and how they approach it, whether it's because of their own experiences, or, yeah, because the way the director approached it kind of like, open my eyes a bit as to like how as to like why the director might have approached it the way that he did. Could have been that maybe he was uncomfortable with the religious aspect, maybe he had a bad experience with the religious aspect that he tried to like move away from that. And same with other peers too, like the reason as to like why they kind of felt pity for me that I got this show, you know, it probably could have been, whatever perception they have of like Christianity or religion specifically, that made them feel pity for me. And, and kind of them being surprised that they enjoyed the show too considering the script, kind of like open my eyes a bit, and made me realize that, like what, how others perceived this piece, and kind of made me a little curious as to why.
Did you have any insights about your own authentic (or inauthentic) self?
Interviewer: Great thank you. And so, when some people think about themselves. They see some parts of themselves as deeply true, real, or authentic. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about your true nature during the process? Did you have any insights about your own authentic or inauthentic self?
Participant: Hmm. I think when it comes to lighting specifically, I learned about myself mostly in an artistic manner because I was this, this was my, I think this is my second show on campus and I remember one night I stayed late with my assistant because we were working on the show, because it's a musical like, obviously it's a musical, there's just so much you have to do that one of my friends came over to the space with us and I was picking color, and she was like amazed. She was like, oh my goodness, what you do to pick these colors? They’re so amazing! And so I guess one thing I, I learned about myself with this piece was that I have an eye for color, even though I don't pay attention to it. I just like I, I can be pretty good at like putting colors together and making it visually appealing and for, for others it may be kind of like a difficult thing, but, it comes naturally to me, even though I, I don't try to like, I don't know, but I don't know how to explain it. But I guess that would be one thing that I came to realization while working this pieces that I, I have an eye for color and color excites me and yeah.
Did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process?
Interviewer: Great. Thank you. so some people believe in ultimate meaning. This is defined as deep underlying meaning that transcends subjective, personal meaning. It is about the nature of existence and identity. It may include ideas about the significance of suffering as well as spirituality. If this idea resonates with you, did you learn anything about ultimate meaning during the process of creating this lighting design?
Participant: Hmm. Oh, yeah, 100%. It would just be, I learned that, light itself, I mean clearly if I'm pursuing it as an art form that it's its own art like whether you know in nature and I learned, I learned that the artistry I take from the outside world God created, whether the sunlight, the moonlight, is what I'm trying to take in into the space and trying to replicate. So I definitely learn about about that. That inspiration I take is not of, or the what I make is not my own like it's obviously it's not original, because I try my best to replicate what's out there like the true form of artistry outside, and bring it inside and try to bring in, pull out those emotional moments we might not acknowledge while we're out in nature, but bringing them inside. Does that answer the question?
Interviewer: Yeah. Great, that's great. Thank you.
Perceptions of reality beyond the physical world.
Interviewer: So the next question is, some people believe, believe or perceive a reality beyond the physical or material world. This may include religious beliefs and experiences such as perceived interactions with God. But also may include mystical or transcendent experiences or interactions with spirits. Did you have any of these kinds of experiences during the creation of this lighting design?
Participant: Oh, yeah, 100%. I, yeah, it would definitely be, definitely during the early process of it, when I was engaging with the script and during, well watching this by watching my own show. In the early process, it would be that, that connection, and like listening to the soundtrack for the original recording of the musical, and like basing it off of the Scripture, just cross-referencing, and like listening to the lyrics of the songs and then basing it off of the Scripture was like, was kind of like seeing it come to life in a sense. Because like, oh, wow! This is what, this is probably what Jesus was going through emotionally and this is probably what the people surrounding Jesus and are following Jesus, were experiencing, and like seeing the questions that they had in the musical and like tying it back to the questions that people had in Scripture. So, so that was interesting, seeing it kind of like come to life, come to fruition as to what it was like. And as for actually seeing it, I felt that going through the show, I felt the emotional, kind of like out, I don’t know if turmoil is the right word, but pretty much what Jesus went through and what, this is the actress that played Jesus, and she kind of like really took his persona really well like it just made you feel for who Jesus was. There was definitely a sense of like having that emotional connection with Jesus. And I've seen, you know, for me growing up in church, I've seen many, you know, renditions, or like types of media that demonstrate the life of Jesus. And not all of them hit, if that makes sense, like emotionally, only a few have, and the fact that I think, because I was able to see this live did something, and being in the room experiencing this, did something to me. I definitely having an experience with with Jesus during this moment the Last Supper and when Jesus was saying goodbye to to all the other characters there. And when he was being betrayed as well, it was just so much. I would say that was like the, the direct connection that I had, and just feeling, having that discernment of what Jesus was going through, specifically the sermon that I've never like experienced before, compared to watching like passion of the Christ, or like other types of media renditions of Jesus’s life.
Interviewer: Thank you. I just have a couple of quick follow-up. Questions.
How old were you?
Interviewer: So how old were you when you created this lighting design?
Participant: I was, wait let me go back to the date, I should have that. I hope I do. Spring 2022, so I was 21.
Interviewer: Okay, great.
Life events
Interviewer: And would you like to say anything about what was going on in your life around the time that you created this lighting design?
Participant: What was going on? Hmm. Okay. I might get emotional saying this, but during this time is when I kind of like hit a point, or acknowledged that my family’s, my parents specifically, their spirituality or their connection to God was waning, like they were just drifting and I guess that's during that time, this show was kind of a distraction. And like, I try not to think about it too much as to who my parents were becoming as they were kind of like leaving church for whatever reasons like they have, because I think this show served as a distraction, and like kind of like a grounding moment, like a foundation to stay true and to hold onto God, no matter what because that was definitely a painful time, and like noticing that and acknowledging it. And it's, and during this time I haven't seen my parents in a long time for that very reason, and not kind of like, not wanting to acknowledge or like face the fact that they themselves, their spiritual selves, they were drifting. So, that was kind of like something emotional or mentally that I was going through. And so when this show was given to me. I, you know, I took it, and I was like, okay, that's why I used it for on as a distraction. And as a reminder, you know, to ground myself in Jesus and in God that, you know, he's important, he's true. And you know, if I wouldn't be who I am, or like my life could be this so much so, like in a different direction, or I would not be where I am right now if you know if I didn’t confide in Him this kind of like solidifying that he's true, he's real, and he's always looking over me. He's always protecting me even through, like those emotional moments, emotional turmoil, and like thinking back to my family and how they're not really living a life with God as much anymore. So this definitely came like in handy, and the fact that my parents came to see it. I don't know, I just, I didn't think about it too much, because I didn't want to. But just hoping that they experienced that connection too, and that it reminded them of who Jesus and what he can do, and kind of like, hopefully that they were able to reflect, of their lives, and who, their sense of being and who they were when they were, had that direct connection, the strong spiritual connection for Jesus.
Interviewer: Great. Yeah, thank you so much for sharing everything.
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